For Em
“If ever there is a tomorrow when we’re not together, there is something you must always remember…
You are braver than you believe, stronger than you feel, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we are apart, I will always be with you”
Today is Emmett’s first birthday! A year ago today I was coming to grips with an unplanned C-section, marvelling at my baby boy’s impressive mop of hair and repeatedly asking the postpartum nurse if it was normal to “feel really overwhelmed?!” If you know me, you know this is extremely apropos Liz behaviour. The pandemic was raging, Trump was still president, and an anti-racism revolution was unfolding. There was a LOT going on.
I would like to say things were smooth sailing after the rocky birth and a short stint in the NICU, but things were bumpy (to say the least) for awhile. A long while. But we came out the other end, I learned, in my own way, to become a mom, and I am really proud of Em and I. We made it!
On this kind of momentous birthday, I wanted to write down a few things I want my boy to know. Right now he is more interested in strawberries and Moana and pulling everything off our shelves, but one day, I know he will want (and need) to hear these things. I will venture to guess that some of us need to, too.
Life is hard, but it’s really not that hard at all. Don’t overcomplicate it, trust your mom on this one.
Family is all that matters.
Be the guy that reads books. Like, actually reads them. Reading will make you a kinder and more interesting person.
If you’re ever in a jam, call your Dad. At any time of the day or night. He’s the calmer one. He’ll pick you up and make you pancakes while you tell him all about it.
Just because you feel anxious or sad sometimes, doesn’t mean you’re an anxious, sad person. The human experience is the wildest rollercoaster you’ll ever go on. Buckle up, but know that it’s ok to not feel ok sometimes. Doesn’t mean you’re anything less than wonderful.
Become friends with people that don’t look like you, talk like you, dress like you, eat the same snacks as you. These people will change your life.
Be earnest in the pursuit of whatever makes you happy. Seriously, we don’t care what that is. But whatever it is, just give it you're all.
Say sorry first.
Please don’t let Smirnoff with a Sprite chaser be your first drink. We’ll arrange something better for you.
Go travelling. Stay in hostels. Sleep in an airport. See the Eiffel Tower. Go to a Full Moon party for heaven’s sake. I insist upon it.
Don’t be afraid to like what you like. Without apology.
If you can be anything, be polite. Please & thanks.
No one, I repeat, no one cares what you look like in your bathing suit. Or your jeans. Or whatever it is you might be worried about.
A good cry and a good sleep can solve almost anything.
Do your research. When you don’t understand something, read up on it. When you assume you make a you know what outta you and me!
It’s tough, but try your best not to be afraid of failure. Do the hard thing, fall down, get laughed at, try again.
Whenever you want to be a smart ass to your mother, remember that I kept you alive with my boobs and wiped the poop out from under your baby balls. Gross right?!
Sometimes it’s better to say nothing at all.
Your mom will always think you're cool.
Don’t forget to have fun.
Happy Birthday Emmett John.